Happy Bloody New Year, The Times. Love, Dubai.

So, The Times embraced the seasonal spirit of goodwill, cheer and positivity with a lovely little piece decrying the obscenity of the Burj Dubai, and pitting it head to head with Masdar down the road - I quote - "the new city of Masdar, now being built in Abu Dhabi as a carbon-neutral eco-city (call it the green suburb of Babel), will stand as an architectural rebuke to the great tower of hubris next door"

There is a lot wrong with this town, I am the first to admit it. But there is a lot right, and I just really feel like these are cheap shots - this story echoes all of the other Dubai-bashing articles that have gone before, offers very little that is new. However, from a local perspective, the direct comparison between Masdar & the Burj Dubai is really interesting, and this is the first time I have read such a direct comparison with such explicit value judgements thrown down.

Masdar is an interesting concept, and if they can pull it off as intended, it will be an incredible achievement. It will indeed serve as a model of how cities can be built in the future, and could be an interesting blueprint for the region, where cities are still being built from scratch, and there is room for this kind of growth. Hopefully, the Masdar team is pioneering practices that can be adapted to cities that have been in existence for hundreds of years, as it is really there that we need to start putting carbon reduction measures in place, rather than focusing on some green utopia that we can create out when given a blank slate, unlimited land, a booming population, and bottomless pit of oil wealth. Not really a transferable model to most countries?

I for one am looking forward to the opening of the Burj in a week or so. It astounds me every time I go for dinner to the Souk al Bahar how many people gather to take photos of the tower, to ooh and ahh (and applaud?) the fountains, which are actually stunningly beautiful. It is a tourist attraction, built in the Gulf, for the Middle Eastern and Asian market, and it works. People here love the clean lines, love the powerful water jets, and choreographed antics of the fountains as they dance to opera, Lebanese folk, Celine Dion, or music hall hits. It's not my scene, but it works. And that is the point.

The tower may be OTT, and to many it will always symbolise the end of Dubai's property boom, but to many others it is an achievement that puts their country, their region, on the global map. These bitter articles always have a tone of something not far from jealousy - like an aging sportsman making snide remarks about the slapdash style of the bright young thing lifting all the trophies... they may be right, but they still aren't winning anymore.

For me, I hope that the opening of the Burj will mark the beginning of a slightly more sensible era, with scaled down madness. It will be flashy, it will be mental, and it will be very, very, 90's Dubai. Perhaps there is a parallel to be made about Dubai living it's flashy 30s (the UAE turned 38 in early Dec) and looking to settle down with a family and a more sedate lifestyle as it looks towards the onset of the big 40 in 2011? I hope so. Because this place has been pretty damn great for me this decade, and I would love to see it succeed in the next one.

Christmas is coming...

...and the best, most Christmassy, and generally cleverest card that I have seen to date has been this from London-based ad agency Mother.
What I love about this e-card is that is features uber-cool London agency types, presenting a 'crazy idea' well executed, and then ties it up really neatly with a great feelgood ending. And takes a couple of neat sideswipes at stereotypes while they're at it, somehow avoiding a preachy or patronising tone. Nice.
There is no way that this wasn't scripted, apart from the lucky lady at the end. I think what I like most about it is that there's a real heart to it, and that, sir, is what Christmas is all about.

Raging against the X-Factor

So little Joe McEldry has lost out to the Facebook campaign, which hoisted Rage Against The Machine to the top spot in the UK pop charts as our Christmas number one.

There are a couple of things about this story that intrigue me, and are worth commenting on.

Firstly, a disclaimer. I was an avid watcher of the X-Factor. I love the combo of reality tv, underdog does good, singing skills of various levels, a tinge of jealousy, and lots of glitz. I have never, ever, taken this Sat night tv guilty pleasure through to actually purchasing any of the singles. They are, without exception, cheesy and manufactured. Miley Cyrus, I ask you. I digress.

Much has been written about the irony of a Facebook campaign exhorting youngsters to buy a single that shouts "Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me" as part of a group movement. Much has also been made of the fact that many of the people who joined the movement didn't care a jot whether a song they'd never heard from RATM beat another song they'd never heard from someone called Joe backed by someone evil called Simon Cowell. They just joined the online movement, because they wanted to identify with a cause. Similarly, I saw a video recently of the founder of Reddit - Alexis Ohanian - talking about how the users of Reddit got behind a campaign that Greenpeace put out there to name a whale - the users chose the name Mister Splashy Pants. Greenpeace weren't too impressed, and tried to extend the campaign to get a serious name selected, and it turned viral.

So, is this about UK music lovers seizing control of their charts, as the RATM guys have gleefully stated? Or is it more about the growing power of social media, and a generation of people who want to be part of movements that they identify with - which are increasingly online, to the consternation and confusion of the management generation. Increasingly, I think it is more the latter, as I would wager that the people who stood up to be counted in this campaign haven't bought a cd single in approximately 15-25yrs. Just a guess.

I loved the campaign, as I do think it is important for people to stand up for something they believe in. I also thought that Joe took it in really good humour, which is important to me, as it could have been taken as a personal attack on a young 18yr old new to the fame game. He was quoted as saying it was "exciting to be part of such a hard fought race", and I think, I hope, that he has a sensible enough head on his shoulders to understand that the machine he just leapt in to isn't necessarily popular with everyone. He stands to make quite a bit of cash out of said machine though, and is following his dream, so he should be just fine.

I do hope that the trend for people joining movements online 'to be part of something' doesn't morph in to something that obscures the meaning and messaging behind some of these movements. Things like the 'Charter for Compassion' deserve to be read, understood, and implemented in the lives of the people that sign up. They shouldn't become meaningless movements that people just sign up to because it's as easy as typing your email address in to a form online, or clicking a box and paying 28c (in the case of the RATM campaign).

One final word on all of this. Large kudos to the RATM guys. They had the nouse to stand up and say - this wasn't us, we didn't start this campaign, it isn't our fight, but we're proud of people standing up against things they don't like, to reclaim music against "happy meal, prefabricated pop". Their interview on Radio 5 also made me smile, where they blatantly ignored the request by the BBC to edit out their famous line: "Fuck you I won't do what you tell me".
Naieve of the Beeb to think that they'd really honour that. Quite amusing to hear the presenter at the end squeaking - "get rid of it!"

But the best bit was their promise to donate the extra profit from the single to Shelter, the homeless charity, right before Christmas. That, to me, is what this season is all about, and it gave me lots of warm & fuzzies.

Here's looking at you, kid!

I read an article recently about mentoring in the comms world, and it struck a real chord with me. Over the past two years, I've developed a mini-mentoring relationship with a couple of exx-employees, and it has been an amazingly positive experience. It has also been somewhat of a surprise to me, as although I'm somewhat experienced now with about 10years under my belt, there is lots of room to grow before I become a guru on anything.

The point about mentoring, for me, is that it is essentially about nurturing talent and encouraging others, based on mutual respect and a sort of friendship. I think I see it as continuing to be a good boss, after you've stopped working together. The two people that I have helped used to be on my team a few years ago, and we worked really well together. By which I mean they were really good at understanding me when I went off on a crazy brainstorm, they knew which rants to ignore, and to listen carefully to others, and they understood when to laugh with me or at me, and when to tell me to shut up.

In the years since I left that company I've stayed close to both people, but interestingly we never really changed our friendship - they still look on me as their old boss, who they call for work chats, work advice, and occasional insights on various regional or economic topics. Sometimes we would schedule time to sit down and talk about certain questions, situations or projects that they were working on at the time. And recently, when I heard of a perfect job for one of them, I put her forward, and have been on the phone with her before a few of the many interviews the company put her through. She aced them, as I knew she could. What was interesting for me was the real gratitude she had for my role - which is crazy when the real reward for me was seeing her achieve this goal.

All getting a bit cheesy and motivational, but I think the point is, although I'd rather work to live, the lines are blurry at the moment, and work is a very central element of my life. It won't always be that way, but for right now, when it is such a focus, I need to get the rewarding, soft/fuzzy, non-bottom-line related benefits where I can. And if that is mentoring someone to achieve a real goal, then that makes me feel pretty damn good.

Little hurdles

We're in our new office today, in Abu Dhabi's twofour54. I still haven't worked out what the name means, but it is clearly the media zone, as there are trendy types with their Mo-vember tasches still firmly on display, sauntering around in slacks and 'tees' in stark contrast to our pencil skirts and heels. Well, the boss isn't sporting the pencil skirt look. Yet. We will convert him.


My desk has a rather nice view of a car park, which seems to be the hangout of choice for out resting bus drivers. I have taken an appallingly bad photo with the blackberry, which will have to do until such time I manage to start carrying my camera around with me again.

We aren't sure what these buses do - they occasionally multiply, then furtively sneak off again, but we never actually see them moving. Perhaps there are Bond-esque trapdoors leading in and out of the grassy knoll behind. We aren't sure what that is either. What we do know, is that the orange building behind the grassy knoll on the far left.... houses a pub. Yes, we got the important information sorted before we finished unpacking the boxes.


However, we didn't account for the dongles.
I'm quite tempted to just leave that hanging.

The dongles are these amazingly expensive little gadgets that plug in to your computer and connect you to tinternet... but we only have two between three of us, as one broke mysteriously earlier on. So you type about three emails, then have to hand the dongle over, and try and remember what kind of work you did before there was email or internet. Amazingly difficult, actually.

Other hot topics of the day have covered whether or not access cards work if you hole-punch them, identifying local landmarks (atm, coffee providers that don't fob you off with bran muffins, ways to get mana'ish that looks like Lebanese Flower's version, rather than Carrefour's minging doughy round thing) with varying degrees of success.



Mini-hurdles - they brighten a quiet day in the office.

Head above the parapet...

It is winter in the sandlands, and weather is stunning. But I've been stuck inside trying to get to grips with whatever is going on with my darling adopted country, as they stick two fingers up to the international investment community, and shoot themselves in the foot where future funding from said community is concerned.

I feel like it has to have an impact on us local folk, but I can’t really work out what that will be. At the most selfish level, will I be taken seriously as a candidate when I leave this crazy town? On one level, my cv might be more interesting because of my exposure to a place on steroids. Or employers may see this period as so far removed from “reality” (whatever that may be) that my experience isn’t actually transferable back to the Western world. Not going anywhere any time soon, so I shall park worrying about that!

It is true that I’ve been pretty bloody negative about the sandlands since the announcement on Wed about the Govt not backing Dubai World’s debt. As the dust clears, I’m still a bit bruised, as if recovering from an hurtful and unexpected jibe from a long-term lover, but I am regaining some pride in this ridiculous adopted homeland of mine, and some objectivity that sits between the blinkered nonsense of the local media, and the doom & gloom pedalled by the UK media.

I’m afraid that it does seem to me that the invective unleashed by the UK and international media recently is something of a cathartic exercise for people who don't feel able to heap the same scathing scorn on their own governments when they feel betrayed and lost at home. Dubai is handy, in that regard, as it is a tiny country, unafraid to stick its head above the parapet and say "hey, world, look at us" ... which we all know is just-not-done in UK culture. Hence many of these puffed chested, soap box, told-you-so type editorials. But to me there is a real undercurrent of fear in many of these stories, a recognition that what happens in this tiny nation state in the middle of a region that confuses and frightens the western world, might actually impact the rest of the world, but cannot be controlled by them. There are no dictators here that can offer a robust excuse for western governments to storm in. Oceans of cash wash through from every corner of the world, good, bad, and ugly, but tell me that doesn't happen in Switzerland, London, or New York?

So the state of the world economy bothers you? Good. It bothers lots of us. But take a second to look at your own doorstep – UK debt for example. 400% of GDP, isn’t it? Dubai is just over 100, I think. No excuses, but a bit of realistic comparison would be useful instead of listing celebs who may or may not have been given free villas in some development complex that happens to be shaped like a palm tree.

In the UK, the government is bound to (albeit foggy) levels of transparency that make Sheikhs snort coffee through their noses at the very thought of releasing such information. I do still think that the “shut up” or “they know nothing” messaging has to stop, and at some point, someone at the top will have to go and get trained in the art of communications, come back, and teach their uncles/elders the art of sticking to messages, and working with, rather than against, the global media. Someone that they'll listen to. Like Fazza - the Crown Prince. Why not?

So what happens next? A much cleverer person than I said yesterday that the question should be – where are the questions? What are the questions? No one has the answers just yet – the meetings are starting to take place, and the restructuring staff have been appointed. So let’s start thinking of the questions that need answering.

Standing, shaking, in the aftermath of the Eid Holiday

So... it has been quite a mental Eid weekend that we are now emerging from, rubbing our eyes and wondering if the world is a couple of degrees skewiff from its axis.

For the uncaring, uninterested (um, click away now, this could turn in to a rant..), or just blissfully uninformed, on Wed last week, after the markets had closed, the Dubai Govt decided to declare that it wouldn't be backing Dubai World's debts, two weeks before the maturation of the Nakheel sukuk on Dec 14th, equalling up to $5.7bn maturing in May '10. They then went on holiday for Eid.

Global markets went a bit nuts. CDS swaps rocketed from about 300 to 570 points for Dubai, with other GCC countries taking about a 20% increase, and European markets getting hit. The pundits went wild, screaming doom from their media pulpits.

Thursday was supposed to be a peaceful religious festival, but many of us spent it watching various news sources, social media streams and and communications channels increasingly focusing on people predicting the end of Dubai, prounouncing gleefully on how its hubris had brought about the end of the glitzy Emirate.

I'm not good at the technicalities, but the calmer commentators debated the finer points of whether it was a default (the ratings agencies decided it was, and downgraded Dubai Inc companies accordingly), or whether this was a precaution prior to a voluntary default. Then they quickly clarified that there would be a restructure of Dubai World. Then Dubai World quickly clarified that DP World wouldn't be part of any such restructure, effectively ringfencing its crown jewels. But when the local markets opened yesterday DP World's share price dropped nearly 15%. It was fairly low before this kicked off.

Then the Dubai World conference call for investors couldn't go ahead ... because the phone lines were overwhelmed. Really?

Now they say that the Dubai Govt never promised to back Dubai World, that it isn't "part of the government" and never was. They suggest that at no time were these debt instruments touted around as safe as houses, with one of the key messages being "the govt will never let these fail, will never let these companies, part owned by the Dubai Govt, go under." I'd respectfully beg to differ, but I was never directly pitched to, so that is speculation. They are basically inferring that this is a game for grown ups, where each person must basically look out for themselves. I think they're right. I also think they should listen to their own advice.

Here is where Dubai needs to tread really bloody carefully. No, let me rephrase. Here is where Dubai needs to take off the large boots that it has previously used for stomping around and doing whatever it jolly well pleases, and start making amends.

Credibility is gone. There is no credibility. Global markets do not trust Dubai based companies to pay. They don't trust them to deliver. Markets reflect this - it is about 5 times as much to pick up Dubai debt than they are to look at AD or other GCC countries. Yes, that's about oil and resources, to an extent, but it is also about track record. And that is, well, shot to shit, right now.

The sad part, for me, is that there are individuals in the middle of this mess who are seriously smart people. There are comms people in the middle of this who know what it means to communicate well. I know, I've worked with them. But I am willing to wager that the FUD that is so prevalent around the emirate at the moment, is only a thin wispy version of that which is flying around the corridors of power. I'm willing to bet that the answer to all of those mental pundits spraying spittle as they fume and turn red in the face with frustration is... we don't know. There simply isn't an answer.

Yet. Maybe the guy from Deloittes who has been parachuted in to run the restructure will be the saviour and put a sensible plan in place. He has some smart predecessors who didn't manage to fix the chaos, but no-one had quite this much shit to sort through. There may be facts in there, there may be some masterplan, but for the first time in my 8 years in the Emirates, I don't think there is. I think the train has derailed, and I think it's going to take a big readjustment of attitude and patience thresholds, with a healthy dose of intelligence and humilty, to get this place back on track.

Ironically, if Dubai can get back on track, if it can beat this massive hurdle and regain the world's confidence, after a year of scathing, below the belt, "dark side" attacks, and get the respect of the financial community by truly acting with transparency, responsibility (fiscal and moral) and a bit of true Arab aristocratic standing (rather than Bedouin scuffling), it may have actually achieved the real end goal, to become one of the Arab cities that goes down in history as a success, rather than a slightly faded, dusty, derelict, city that once was glorious.

This land is your land...

But unlike the song, this land is not my land.

I've just watched an unashamedly sentimental episode of Boston Legal, clearly designed to be screened around the time of the American presidential elections. Whilst the debates were interesting (I always enjoy scriptwriters getting carte blanche to get real opinions off their chests) it did lapse in to a flag-fest, with twangy country music (this land is yoooor laaand...etc) and a couple of 'God Bless America' moments.

Here in the UAE, meanwhile, National Day is nearly upon us. Websites inviting one and all to record our tributes to Baba Zayed accompany flags on every corner. Somehow, nationalism in the UAE feels more heartfelt, more honest, and more sincere, than the Hollywood (or Boston) treatment of American pride.

I hope this country can preserve that honesty and innocence in its pride, and avoids the schmalz that can so easily accompany nationalistic fervour.

Watch your mouth...

I love this story. Partly because it indadvertently paints a wonderful picture of the chaos that reigns in the Dubai Courts, and partly because it is actually quite interesting from a privacy/rights point of view.

To briefly summarize the case - a business partner in a restaurant has been hauled in front of a judge for posting pictures of an ex-employee on Facebook, with slanderous comments about the amount of money he allegedly stole. The defendant has pleaded guilty ("because he agonized me") although apparently (according to FakePlasticSouks) this case may be running in parallel with one in another area of Dubai Courts. FPS makes the point that it is interesting partly because it was brought in front of a judge in the first place, marking a level of success for Dubai's fledgling eCrime division, or whatever it is called.

To me, it's another case examining how we set our own boundaries for behaviour online. When I arrived in the UAE, the Middle East was years behind the rest of the world in terms of technology trends and adoption. Today, that is far from the case. Even when we're talking about slandering people online, unfortunately.

The accepted rule of thumb is to behave online as you would in public. But for a new agency convert such as myself, what does that really mean? Clearly, the behaviour displayed in the case above was fit for the primary school playground and absolutely slanderous. However, is office chat really something you'd indulge in if your client was sitting at your desk? Probably not.

I have set myself new rules of thumb. Emails should reflect the language you would use in a business meeting, and any postings on social media should stay within the limits you would set yourself at your clients' evening events.

Oh.. and final rule of thumb... set my privacy settings on Facebook sky high, so that I can relax there, and be the person I am on Sunday mornings... :-)

Talking Ted

Spent the day today at TEDxDubai - a younger sibling of the global TED conferences that regularly blow my mind. The basic premise of the conference is "ideas worth spreading", and they seek to bring together all sorts of people to talk on topics across technology, entertainment and design (umm... T.E.D...) without a commercial aspect. You have to apply for a ticket to attend, and then it is free, meaning that the only people there are there because they want to attend, rather than seeing it as a tick in a box on an HR form.

Too much to tell about TEDxDubai... once there are videos on their site I'll post links. Suffice to say, I enjoyed it - I hung out with friends that I hadn't seen for a while, and met their friends. I listened to inspiring people. I lost at buzzword bingo - being a bit cynical, I'd bet on "vision" as the word of the day. "Inspiration" was a run away winner - and rightly so. After a while it was wrong to keep score, and slightly embarrassing that we'd been so impolite as to cast aspersions on these peoples thoughts and ideas.

Highlights -

Jiochi Ito - a venture captialist from Silicon Valley who is part of the group setting up Creative Commons - a way to standardize legal agreements that will open up sharing of information, photos, articles and music across the internet. Mind blowing.

Dr Naif al Mutawa - hilarious. Seriously funny man. Describes himself as over educated as he couldn't figure out what to do after he got banned from Kuwait for his writing in the 90s. So he set up "The 99" - super heroes who each have a stone powered with one of the 99 traits of Allah. He's done an animated film, which will be shown at Cannes. DC Comics contacted him, and they're going to do a joint series where Superman/SpiderMan etc join up with the 99 to fight evil powers. How to influence the youth. Love, love, love it. And he was funny. Result.

Mohammed Saeed Harib - is it a coincidence that he's also in animation? Mohammed created Freej, which I love, and he was in equal parts an adorable young scruffy artist (in a dishdash and ghutra - in the style of our dear crown prince Fazza, naturally), as well as an entrepreneur and Chairman of his own empire. Freej came out of a project he was asked to do when he was at Northwestern, in the US. Base something on one of your cultural heroes, he was told. So he drew his grandmother and her three friends. Nuff said.

Paul Bennett - of Ideo. Sorry, did you hear that - he's from IDEO. They're really cool and alternative, and nothing like McKinsey. Did you notice my trendy scarf? It was featured in AN ARTICLE I was in, cos like, I'M IN THE MEDIA. But the most important thing we teach our employees is sublimation of the ego... maaan... we need to disappear.
Knob. We called him The Gnome.

Dubai Abdulla Abulhoul. Age 13. Youngest filmmaker in the region, and has decided already that she's going to win an Oscar. Wouldn't put it past her, and certainly wouldn't stand in her way. Mini dynamo - slightly precocious but to be honest... don't you have to be, to make it in that world?

Jamil Abu-Wardeh. I was introduced to him when he came over to set up MTV Arabia, probably 4 years ago. He then decided that the Arab world needed stand up comedy, so put together the Axis of Evil tour. Hilarious. He stood up and talked about the terms comedians use - "he bombed" = bad. "He killed" = good... and managed to spin out an 8min talk on the need for home grown entertainment, in to a commentary on language, and a proper laugh fest. That, is skill.

Ian Gilbert. Asked us if a crashed car was parked. Talked about developing education to inspire children. Asked why we need teachers when we have the internet. Managed to take a talk that could have been cliched and a bit predictable, and twist it to make our brains hurt. If only he'd been cloned and put in schools everywhere.

There were more. Ernst van der Poll spoke passionately about conserving our seas. Maserat Daud talked about inspiring teachers in 8 days. Khulood al Atiyat on her project "Unleash" about passing out journals in to the community for people to draw in and send back.

And finally - they showed us a video, from a previous TED winner, who came up with the Charter for Compassion. This to me, embodies everything that I was taught about religion. Sharing, understanding, compassion, conversation, community. These people are honestly building bridges, and I really hope they can make something out of this fledgling initiative. It is a pretty simple and non-religious message - do unto others as you would have done to you.

What a fantastic day.

Distant echoes of "ch-ching" for Twitter?

I picked up an interesting link today from a post by @CMEGroup on Twitter, which was a blog post about the potential for algorithmic trading based on Twitter feeds.

The blogger highlights a new technology from StreamBase, who have developed a Twitter interface for their CEP engine, or in layman's language, their blackbox trading technology. Basically, they have built applications that look at real time events, analyse their impact and decide whether to act - eg decide whether to trade based on that event/information.

Their release sums it up best:Mark Palmer, CEO of StreamBase (@mrkwpalmer). “We’re seeing business applications that ingest Twitter message content, frequency, patterns, hashtag use, and so on, and then transmit Twitter messages. For example, trading systems or operations support can use Twitter direct messaging to alert users of trading opportunities or system problems. Systems can also use Twitter messages to assess economic sentiment in real-time for trading systems, or marketing analytics, through monitoring news headlines and popular sentiment transmitted via Twitter. And we’ve even seen interest from the government and security industries for in-bound Twitter message processing.”

The most interesting point for me is how this shows that there is real business use for the "fuzzy" facts that Twitter offers. In one of the response posts, the blogger states:"Streambase's ability to use Twitter as a source of "fuzzy" information would increase my edge on the rest of the market."

This is the key point for me - as he makes clear, trading is not an exact science, and traders use every source of material possible to spot trends, and make their trading decisions before that trend breaks. For example, the Iran election news that broke on Twitter could have impacted FX trading. In a more local example, the recent #etisalatfail stories about the Blackberry patch should impact Etisalat's business, if it weren't part of one of the most ridiculous duopolies ever dreamed up.

What this also underlines though, is the fact that Twitter appeals most to those in the news, media, and tech industries. These are the people that see the value and are out there busily forming communities and creating conversations, and it could be the case that the stellar rates of growth slow once those industries are online and Tweeting away. Yes, there are lots of people in those industries. Yes, there are celebrities and their followers (though I think this phenomenon has a shelf-life, personally). But when positioned against the likes of Facebook, which is designed to appeal to everyone with some semblance of a family or social life, I'm not sure that Twitter has the same ubiquitous appeal.

So, the trading industry has seen a potential business opportunity in Twitter, and is now busily making it work for them as a media alert service and trend spotting tool. It seems to me that this is where Twitter needs to start to get smart and actively start searching for ways to license fat feeds to companies such as StreamBase, answering the interminable question - how can Twitter make money?

How Tea Fixes All Ills.

I've deleted a rant that I posted yesterday. It was a bad day, designed to test me, and I failed. Lesson learnt - don't use public blog forums to vent. Use private blog instead.

There is no point railing against the idiocies of corporate life in public, either suck it up and stay a part of it (and keep getting paid) or decide enough is enough, and head off to the beaches of Thailand to become a dive instructor.

Whether or not the latter option is becoming increasingly attractive, is also not a matter for this forum.

However, yesterday's fury-storm did achieve one small thing. It reminded me of the restorative qualities of a cup of tea.Tea rocks. It is both soothing and perking (is that a word? It should be.) It is terribly English (in my opinion) yet strangely appropriate for most cultures and settings around the world. It calms furies, and realigns the brain-planets, allowing for rational thought. It should be drip fed to world leaders 24/7.

End of sermon.

Toasting with a glass half-full

So - a spot of positivity to take us in to the long weekend (hallelujiah...!)

Couple of things making me smile today - one that involves drinking, and one that doesn't. Let's start with the latter...

MEPRA - the Middle East PR Association - has recently been resurrected from zombie status by the indomitable Rebecca, who has been doing a sterling job rousing all of us in the industry out of a collective grumpy stupor. I'm a member for the first time in about 6yrs (I was a member when I first arrived, and quickly decided to save my cash), and am actually getting involved...

Yesterday saw the first Twitter workshop held by Spot On PR at the Hilton, and by all accounts it went down a storm. There were certainly interesting tweets about the event, with Dubai 92 DJ Catboy interacting with the participants thru Twitter in real time.

The next one is due to be held at the DME, on the trading floor (my gaff) on the 26th July, and seems to be coming together rather nicely. Rebecca sent the invite today at 10am and it was fully booked by 3pm. Not too shabby, especially as it's summer time and in theory everyone has fled the sandpit.

I'm looking forward to it, should be a good event. Will be good to see the SpotOn crowd in the flesh, rather than the Twitterverse, for a change!

In other news, a friend and meeja-type also recently decided that us birds in PR and the media don't get together nearly enough, and floated the idea of a networking event. She sent the invite to her network, and a good few of us were briefed to pass it on to our respected networks, and so far, she's had an excellent response.

It'll be good to have a chance to socialize with some of the people that you tend to just run in to at industry events, when one or the other usually has a particular agenda/manic client/deadline. It'll also be rather nice to meet some of the people who are currently just names in the ether. I'm looking forward to it.

The Cultural Band-Aid

Firstly - a disclosure up front. I'm an expat brat. What this basically means is, I grew up in Saudi Aramco, in a camp that looked eerily like the Truman Show village, where most people were American, and the ones that weren't, wanted to be. Yes, it was in Saudi Arabia, yes, we learnt Arabic at school - did we assimilate? Did we hell. The company nationalized in '85 (I was 9) and suddenly moved all of the Saudis off camp, giving them free loans to build their own houses. Our daily use of Arabic dwindled, and we trotted out stock phrases to chat in local shops on weekend excusions to Khobar, and then headed off to boarding school at the age of 11. So, I'm wide open to the accusation of hypocrite here, but I'm going to stick my flag in the sand anyway.

In my time here, one of the things that has irritated me the most is a phenomenon that (for the sake of argument) we'll call the cultural band-aid. Intelligent people, who are here to embrace new experiences and cultures, occasionally have a lapse in to the old "us & them" mentality. And it really annoys me.

I was reminded of this recently when I watched a video posted on a news site, demonstrating the appaling standards of driving in the UAE. It wasn't the driving that put my teeth on edge. It was the dialogue - where the "GASP"s should have been in speech bubbles, as well as the fact that they were out there to judge, but the verdict was in long before they got in the car.

In my opinion - if you don't like being flashed, get out of the outside lane. Simple. Whether or not you're doing 10k over the speed limit. But that's not the point.

The point is, I think that expats have a tendency to believe, in the very hidden core of their psyche, that the locals are fortunate to have us around. I include all expats in this generalization, so yes, everyone who isn't an Emirati.

So, as much as many of us "embrace" local culture, practice our stumbling arabic, observe local customs and try and befriend Emiratis, we have a tendency to revert back to our cultural groups for comfort, familiarity and reassurance, and gloss over the cracks with a handy cultural band-aid - the patronising us&them comments that many or most of us have made at some point.

Driving standards, maids, labour in general, queues, government officials/offices, the police, gender equality... the list is long. Don't like it, don't get it, don't want to think about it, stick a band-aid on it ... "they're dreadful, they don't understand, it's so 3rd world, tchah, tsk, grumble.." Magic. You feel better having "explained" the behaviour, and thus the blemish is covered, and we can continue "assimilating" the bits we like and approve of.

It's a dangerous game, and seems to be leading to a backlash, with Emiratis forming groups on networking sites such as Facebook hitting back at the expat hoardes.

Our time here is limited kids, make the bloody most of it.

Get out your hatchets..

There are things that PR people are never meant to do, or at least, be seen to do. One of the most important, is to avoid ever whingeing about the media.

I'm sorry, on this occasion, I just can't.

Before I start, I'd like to note that I have worked with very talented and insightful people from all sorts of cultures, and managed to communicate a company's story (with the help of bilingual colleagues) in many languages. It's one of the things I love about living abroad.

But too often, we hear yet another rant from regional journalists on the dire state of regional PR. By and large, I think they have a lot of valid points. There is too much release-spam being issued on a daily basis, there are too many clueless execs following up with pointless phone calls, I agree, I agree, I agree.

However, I would ask these journalists to take two minutes at the next pointless press conference that you attend (I promise, the spokespeople will be at least 30mins late, you have plenty of time) to look around and observe the activity of the average lesser-spotted-Dxb-journo.

Many of these people walk in, say "Where's the press release" and walk out again. Many interrupt your spokesperson to say "What does your business do?" Questions, if there are any, are rarely informed.

I have come to terms with all of these idiosyncrasies, and accepted this as my lot. Fine. I'll even accept the accusation that the PRs should have briefed these people better (though I'd argue that most of the time, we've tried, and given them as much info as possibly can.)

But the hatchet job, no, that pisses me off. Just as it is common courtesy for PR people to give journalists a story in good time to research, write, edit and file, it is common courtesy for journalists writing a story on a company to give the company a chance to comment. And if you don't, don't expect me to come running back and with exclusives and interviews - I've got enough of a battle on my hands trying to educate my execs on why they shouldn't go to your boss.

And breathe...

... and then there was one...

So Dubai-Inc creeps towards becoming a world dominating entity. In fact, one news report claimed that the upcoming "merger" of Dubai Holding's real estate entities in to Emaar (they're being swallowed, come on, they sacked all their staff months ago) would create the largest corporation on earth.

Well, we have the biggest building, why not shoot high...

The news caused Emaar stocks to plummet, ostensibly because of the lack of data around the actual value of the assets being incorporated. It's a fair comment, as there is precious little information on any of them, as they're all private companies.

As the dust starts to settle in the sandpit and the bare bones of the restructure start to become visible, one just wonders whether anyone really knows what it's going to look like when it's done. I used to have faith that they did. I'm not so convinced anymore.

Gulf News in ParisHiltonworship shocker

And so the debate over mainstream media coverage of the recent events in Iran wages on. In a slightly more lighthearted vein, Gulf News managed to put three of the most unrelated news stories next to each other yesterday.

The recount story. Important bit of news. I'd suggest that the deaths of 7 overnight, the beatings and burnings at the University, and a bit of analysis on overall situation might have been more worthy of the front page, rather than a rather badly written summary of the official statements issued by the Iranian regime.

Ok so, it's not a great story, but it is important world news worthy of top headline status, which it has got. Iran is right next door. And this is the Gulf News. And this country is full, full, full of Iranians, who are rightly rather upset and concerned about the events in their country.So what do they put next to it? Paris fucking Hilton. The sub-head reads "Hollywood glamour burst from the doors of an aircraft at Dubai Airport as Paris Hilton touched down in the UAE - and Gulf News was there to capture the moment."

Gulf News was also there to "capture a moment" when the Iranians went out on the streets of Dubai to protest. That picture was buried in the back somewhere and I had to dig to find it on the web. There wasn't any mention of the protests on the streets outside the Iranian embassy in Dubai.

In contrast, there are big fat stories pondering "What Paris will do in Dubai?", "Paris' first comment on landing in Dubai" {when can i see the desert} "Competition - win Paris' handbag"And to top it all off, the other story that made the front page..... "British women told to keep their tops on abroad." Right. Because all of us Brits have been flaunting our bosoms around Dubai like a fleet of Carry on up the Sheikh Zayed Road nymphettes.

I despair.

The light at the end of the tunnel for me tho, was a little snippet in dear old Gulf News reporting that Dr Al Fahim has been replaced as CEO of Hydra. I can't help but wonder if that might be related to the fact that the New York Times wrote a rather scathing article recently, noting that the University where Dr Fahim (as he insists on being addressed) doesn't actually offer the doctorate program in real estate that he apparently completed. Never has. Good plan that - make up a doctorate, create a TV show that is a complete rip off of "The Apprentice" and you've styled yourself as Donald Trump, sell a shed-load of real estate then forget to build the actual houses, buy a football team, and expect everyone to sit back and laud you with praise and reward.

The words - You're fired.... must be ringing in his ears...

Poor lil Senator...

Another lovely Twitter moment.
This evening I find myself in the Emirates lounge, waiting to board the 245am flight to Gatwick landing at 720am. I've read a mag, downed a Canadian Club/Soda, played on facebook, and then turned to Twitter. To find the Twitterverse delighting in "handing the ass back" to a Republican senator from Michigan who'd decided to draw a parallel between the persecution that Iranian protestors are experiencing this week, and the drubbing that the Republicans received in Congress over something or other.

I didn't believe the initial tweet and replied to a contact. He sent me a link and it's true - this idiot actually thought that was a fair comparison. The mind boggles.

A sample of the (rather amusing) responses includes:
TPIP: hey @nancypelosi can you please tear gas @petehoekstra and beat him repeatedly with batons so he has something real to whine about? about 1 hour ago
•TahirDuckett: @petehoekstra ran through the sprinklers this morning, claimed solidarity with victims of Hurricane Katrina about 1 hour ago
• d_knox: d_knox @petehoekstra, i broke a glass today. now i know what the kristallnacht must have felt like
• _DeadBattery: All I'm saying is - imagine, time last year, someone told you that @JohnMcCain and @PeteHoekstra would be all buddy-buddy with Iranians. about 1 hour ago
• jdb: @petehoekstra I had to pay sales tax on some potato chips today... Now I know what our Founding Fathers went through. about 1 hour ago
• Mitch42: Uh No.: @petehoekstra (R - MI): "Iranian twitter activity similar to... last year when Rs were shut down in the House." #analogyfail about 1 hour ago
• ktcowen: RT @curtsmith responses to Rep.@petehoekstra comparing freedom fighters in Iran with Republicans are hilarious: http://bit.ly/Yumry (expand) about 1 hour ago
•Jdb: RT GOP Rep @petehoekstra: Iranian twitter activity similar to what we did in House last year when Republicans were shut down in the House. about 1 hour ago
• Cut_here: @petehoekstra I burned my finger this morning on a hot plate, now I know how Joan of Arc felt.. about 1 hour ago
• TahirDuckett: @petehoekstra and @johnculberson, those poor Congressmen have so much in common with disenfranchised Iranians dying for democracy. Pathetic. about 1 hour ago
•Trusloth: @petehoekstra Got a $0.25 library fine. Reminded me of debtors' prison #GOPFail about 1 hour ago
• Amysco: @petehoekstra Yep, you're just like the Iranians! I must've missed Nancy Pelosi and her army beating you with clubs... about 1 hour ago

That's just a sample. It amused me hugely. It illustrates so many of the key key key elements of any successful comms strategy - it doesn't really matter about the medium - if your message is flawed, you're buggered. Ok, so that may not be how I phrase it in training sessions, but essentially it boils down to one thing. The immediacy of the media today means that anyone in a position of responsibility immediately needs to be aware that anything they say, anywhere, will form and shape the dialogue around their particular sphere. Thus they must learn from comms pros, or work with comms pros, to decide what that message is. It's not rocket science. But it amuses me hugely that a half-brained republican senator from michigan stepped up so willingly as the sacrificial lamb to the cause. Alhumdillilah.
If that's not too controversial a sign off...?

Introduction - sans flourish

So, what qualifies me to talk about communications in the Middle East? 7yrs of trying? As those who know me will know, I have a tendency to hold an opinion on most topics, including quite a few on the development of the PR industry in to an integrated communications field, regionally and internationally.

During my time in the UAE, Dubai has mushroomed from a relatively modest town into a city with global ambitions. Many of the PR companies who were here and established back then, are (by and large) still in business, with loyal clientele who know that their advisors understand the way this town works. Whether or not they are totally au fait with the way this town wants to work is a completely different matter.

The onset of the financial boom in Dubai opened a window for an influx of international PR brands setting up mini-offices here staffed by personable types with the gift of the gab, selling global networked teams and experience of top level comms in western capital markets. Their arrival shook the local industry, and raised everyone's game significantly.

The media landscape has changed enormously in the 7yrs I've been here, from swelling (and shrinking) local papers, to the wires bureaus expanding their teams from one floating editor covering all stories coming out of any one, or all, of the GCC countries, to fully staffed and supported offices, to an actual broadcast industry, or the launch of new papers like The National that actually do push the famous envelope.

And finally, the part that I'm most interested in, the onset of social media. I'm indulging my voyeuristic tendencies at the moment, tweeting and facebooking relatively frequently, blogging (on my personal blog) relatively frequently, and dipping in to the worlds of Blip.fm, Netvibes, Google Wave and more. I'm fascinated to see how this trend develops, as it continues to encroach on the mainstream media world, impacting the way we consume media on a daily basis.

Enough of an intro. I'll be back, when something irks me, or I have a point to make that doesn't fit in 140 characters.